Wednesday, 29 June 2016

Proud writing

 was running up the sideline looking for someone to pass to. I couldn't see anybody because it was like I was in a metal box and I was locked in it because people were surrounding me from every way. Someone was running to me like a Viking chasing a bull. I was right at the goal so I sli-tackled the ground and hit the ball in the goal !!!!!! . I slid across the grass with happiness in my heart. 


  1. I like how you described the moment when you couldn't see anybody to pass to and that it felt like you were locked up into a metal box.

  2. I like your writing but the first little sentence didn't make sense but other than that I loved it it blew my mind away.